.....iNTeRVaNtIoN...

ooOOPPPsssss...i did it agAiN...wats wrong wit me..huhu=(

Im sorry and i know its not real. u and me are not real.
dont worry.i'll fix it.

5th anniversary

im 'speches'...hehehehe...

priceless gift for our 5th anniversary..yes it is

thank you zikri.

7 april 2006 - 7 april 2011

hope we will make it to destination.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjg2-rm_0tU&NR=1

amiiinnnnnn.....

im coming.........

first vacation using my own salary....(with sponsored tickets)..hehehe

love flying so muchhhhhhhhhhyy...

hehehe...hope it went well...

........................................................................................bon voyage.

..underSTOOD

.........i understand one thing tonite:

Need really to luv myself more than i could love others.

all these while, i loves some one more than myself.everything i do,everywhere i go, i jus hope im doing it, being there with you. for me..dat anything wit u is da best, happiest moments.u r in every of my plan.but i just realized, u not feel da same.

i still trust u and want to trust u, but reality is hurt.

please wake up, myself.he will not always be there and want to be there for you.

afterall, its between Allah and me.He never leave me. you are just a person, which i need to believe for 99% only. there's always 1% possiblity for you to just turn off.

i hate ur "dont-care" attitude.its killing us.

Is this's we call Real Life???

...position, authority, wealthy, superiority, and all other "state of life" which put us, sometimes above the others is given to 'test' ourself, in return.

few months in da "real world", i hav had already seen colors of life and people. to be someone below the others, and to "watch" and "listen" others be above the other people is a painful experience. i realised dat sometime, as a human somehow we jus kind of forget to analyse our own steps, and words before or at worst, after we did/said it.

i realised and want others to aware dat wat ever job which gives "power" to us over the others, is not really mean dat we can treat them as we want. this "power" never, on its on to declare that u are gud compared to people under ur authority. and most of that "power" is jus given to make sumthing working, not really is ur own power. In short, u are da representative which hiding behind dat power.

problems with us, human..you and me..we easy to feel proud on small thing dat we hav achieved or given to us. we make our own intepretation dat we hav already above da other, gud enuf to tease and belittle others.

these dramas, just really make me laughs inside, and wanna cry at da same time. Wat a world!..yeayh...wat a world.

a reminder for me..and you..and others:

never lose our humanity, rasional judgement, and manners whenever we are up at da top or down at bottom. Do not make our own words and steps show how "badly" we are inside. you what, our verbal and non-verbal comm. are enuf to reflect who we are inside. be someone with brain.

................................its much more easier to be clever, but not wiser person.

"Tak susah untuk jadi bijak, tapi tak ramai yang dapat jadi bijakSANA"

Play to be a good Venusian...will i?

In the "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" ...i learned dat man cope wit problems in different way than woman does.i learned dat woman and man tend to and most likely "does" intepret each other words to a totally different meaning. i also learned that i shud give "time" and "space" for him to "breathe". this is my biggest weakness. i jus cannot accept the fact dat he loves to see me happy wit my own life when he's not around. wat i had in my mind is dat i could be and actually real happy just when he's around. i just cant separate him apart from whatever i do everyday..kind of obsess right??heheh..well, dis is me (wat u expect??..hehe)

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....honestly,,,im not happy dat im too obsessed to him..dat's no good..for some reasons, definitely..

He is "man dat goes wit da flow"..my heart just like suddely STOP beating, and broke to pieces whenever he said dat..i guess..and definitely sure every woman would feels da same when someone we love (so much) honestly said that he jus go wot da flow..if i want to flow his flow, than our relationship is safe, if im about to follow my own "flow",then, he would jus go wit his own. doesnt me got some meaning to him??not even a bit?

i donno wat others will do if they faced same thing, but till now..i choose to follow his "flow". i just donno.even its broke my heart, but somehow..i still have some hope to my relationship.deep down me, i still believe in him.i can feel a kind, honest, loving person in him. these hold me to stay wit him no matter how harsh his words, no matter how im upset wit his "girlfrens". i know that i cant expect him to be or to act the same way as i am.im a person dat loves something for just one only.i like da same brand for my perfume, my clothes, my fav. movie,my handphone..i jus need one of everything.i dont need two. for me, if we had something more than 1, we tend to not appreciate them as much as if we jus had it one. and for dat, im comfortable wit jus one YOU. not interested to build some interest in other men. and again, i am aware dat my mike are not like this.and this upset me..(once again,,wat do i expect???)hehehe

hmmmmmmmmmm...i donno how to talk about this again. everytim i tried to discuss wit him, we will end up fighting and he would jus ignored me, fed up, and start to be so "cold" to me.sometimes i feels like im not da one he loves.it seems like his frens win, and im lose. jus like friend is more important to him than mine.do him really doesnt need me?anymore?

after i read da book, i always tried to give him his own space, try to accept dat he likes to have girl frens and im always trying. honestly, it's real hard.yup,..indeed. till now..i still cant feel good, or at least feels nothing when i read about "gedik2" comments from his girl frens. i am HURT. yes. HURT everytim. i would not do like that to him.but he did it.because dat is HIM, ..wat else shud i expect??dont u remember dat i got a soft-tender heart?

i really hope dat i do mean something to him..and please tell me dat i am. Try to be a good Martian, will you??

Where is WOMBAT??

im in KL, and you r in somewhere in NSW..wombat where it is??is it so isolated and remote n my msg wasnt delivered to you...huhuhu..

yummy cherries...

hmm..i kind of missing "you"..my last message wasnt delivered to u..thats y i choose to write and message wit my frens so i wont be sad. He was arrived to WOMBAT this evening, i guess..and i donno where it is..i jus knoe is about 3-4hrs from NSW city and the telecom line not soo gud there.hope he safe and enjoy wit his frens..they actually go there for cherry picking. I was da one who asked him to join it. If not,he would be alone in NSW,witout doin nothing..thats make me more worry bout him...i hope you safe and back "in a piece" to sydney..see u in a month.. i have promised dat i'll be OK.so..please OK..

Wombat, take gud care of him..n his frens ..k..